The Plan

So, it's Monday evening and I have just re-watched my second video for this blog. It is a strange thing to watch yourself calmly speak of things that cause such a range of emotions inside you. I notice the uncomfortable eye flickers when I speak about revealing my dilemma to my partner, I notice how after the three drinks I have already had when I recorded the video this afternoon how I am already not speaking as clearly as I should. I notice the flashes of pain, hurt, shame, fear as they pass across my face in milliseconds. I also notice the determination, love for my family, gratefulness to my partner, humility in my present reality in my face, and it is these that give me assurance I have the will, and the reasons, to fulfill my ambition for this coming adventure.

When I told some of the people around me about "the plan" a number of them asked if I would consider video blogging my journey. After consideration I agreed and this is what brings us together here.

My vision for this blog, above all, is that it is as honest a representation of my journey as I can possibly stand. This means I will not be editing, I will not be "producing" great looking little advertisements for myself, and, I will not be censoring myself. I will be merely pressing record on my iphone or my laptop and then uploading to here. This, to me, seems to be the only production value worth adhering to if I am going to produce something that maybe helpful or of service to others or even of interest to you.

The other thing that occurred to me was that this can be a helpful and powerful instrument of discipline and I will have you to motivate me and keep me focussed. You can let me know when you believe I am not fulfilling my undertaking to myself, my family and to you. So, here we are. And here's "The Plan".